Link: Comic 315
Translations: http://www.beaverandsteve.com/wiki/images/8/8f/Finnishflag.png Finnish, http://www.beaverandsteve.com/wiki/images/5/52/Frenchflag.png French, http://www.beaverandsteve.com/wiki/images/5/57/Polishflag.png Polish, http://www.beaverandsteve.com/wiki/images/0/04/Danishflag.png Danish, http://www.beaverandsteve.com/wiki/images/7/79/Italianflag.gif Italian
Title: the Steve Solution
Date: November 13, 2007
Summary: Steve is Bathed.
"Fin" style: Written with icky muck.
Number of panels: 9
Beaver has a Menacing Frown and a brush.
Beaver: Right Steve, I think it's time you had a bath.
Steve looks like a swamp monster's nightmare. There is a duck in a nest on his head, and many nasty biological things oozing from him. He is standing in a puddle of his own filth.
Steve: What makes you say that?
Steve is in a bathtub full of ham-flavoured foam. The duck, looking back reproachfully at Steve with a tear in his eye, has his possessions tied up in a handkerchief on a stick over his shoulder, and is wearing a top hat. Beaver is scrub-a-scrubbing Steve.
Beaver: Just look at the state of you - you're filthy! When was the last time you had a bath?
Steve: Bah! I had one just the other day!
THE OTHER DAY:
A ruff-wearing Steve is splish-splashing in a puddle (puddle composition: 60% mud, 30% wee, 10% muddy wee). Walter Raleigh (possibly), Queen Elizabeth I and a dog with a ruff are looking on in abject horror.
Steve: Hee hee! Look! I'm having a bath! Woo!
Elizabeth I: Forsooth, what is that wretched stench? GROSS!
Dog in Ruff: Ruff,
Steve is in the bath, still being scrubbity-scrubbed by Beaver. His skin is now its natural dark green and the bathwater is the colour of the vile mud.
Steve: Come on, I'm clean now! Let me out! I'm getting all pruney!
Beaver: You're not done yet - there's still dirt coming off!
Steve: That's not dirt! That's my skin's natural protection!
Beaver pours a large amount of water on Steve from a jug.
Beaver: Oh shush! I'll just rinse you off and you'll see how much better you look without all that muck!
A white chicken is sitting in the middle of the bath. The water is Steve-coloured and Steve's back spine thingies are floating about in it. Beaver looks on in puzzlement.
Beaver: Hmm... perhaps I did scrub a little too hard.
Beaver, unfazed by Steve's apparent chicken-ness, wraps the chicken up in a pink towel and carries him off.
Beaver: Well, let's get you dried up and ready for bed.
The bathtub is full of Steve-coloured water. Steve's back spines and eyes are floating about in it.
Bath: Beaver? Can I get out now?
Beaver (offstage): Oh, silly me, I almost forgot to pull out the plug...
The scrubbing brush is a PANDA!